Katya's Non-Profit Marketing Blog

Listening is everything - and damn hard to do

The more I Tweet and post on Facebook and blog, the more I am struggling to have time to really LISTEN to people. I don’t want to follow and friend more people than I can sincerely engage with, but perhaps that makes me seem like a diva. This is a condundrum many of us face. All I know is this - I want to err on the side of engagement that is authentic. I want to truly be on the other side of the conversation, at least some of the time. But it is not easy.

At the same time, it has never been so important. In this noisy world, we are pleasantly stunned when someone devotes their full attention to us. Imagine if you did that for the people you want to reach. Imagine what might change.

Bad things happen when we stop paying attention to the people around us. We lose them. Our relationships suffer. Social injustices occur – just ask a homeless person how invisible she feels. Our supporters abandon us. Our customers hate us. (Our customers really hate us – look no further than untied.com, a website devoted to people frustrated their complaints are not heard by United Airlines.)

Extraordinary things happen when we recognize people – when we truly hear, see and acknowledge them. Listening – just listening, simple as it is – creates great relationships, strong societies, powerful organizations and profitable, popular businesses.

I have to have more time to do it.

How do you make the time?

Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 11/10 at 09:28 PM

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Comments

Katya, I don’t think listening is about making more time to do it but more about integrating it naturally into the way we live and communicate with each other every day, all the time. The book, “The Present,” by Spencer Johnson, is a simple yet powerful read that makes a powerful point. If we truly live in the present and believe that every encounter has a purpose, our relationships in work and life are more purposeful and satisfying. Listening is a skill we must develop to take advantage of those encounters and to see the purpose!

Posted by Karen on 11/11 at 10:35 AM

I completely agree with you regarding the difficulty of keeping up with social connections online. It’s overwhelming. I find myself tuning in and out as time allows, which isn’t the best. So, sometimes I’m a great listener and other times I’m absent. It’s a real struggle.

Listening is truly powerful, though. I recently had someone from a company in the U.S. contact me (I’m in Canada) looking for business writing services. I asked her if she knew she was contacting someone from Canada. She said she was aware of that but she was completely frustrated with her online search—-she couldn’t seem to find anyone local who could do the job. She did find some blog posts of mine, however, and she thought I might offer the service she needed.

I took the time to find out exactly what she was looking for and what search terms she was using. I suggested ways to refine her search. After I got off the phone, I did my own online search and found several communications firms in close proximity to this company. I called the person back and suggested a few options.

Three days later, the person called me back to say her company wanted me to do the work, despite the fact that I was a long distance away. She said that she appreciated the extra time I spent to figure out what her company truly needed.

The business writing job was very straight forward. Any of the firms I referred this company to could have done the job. However, because I took the time to build a relationship (without even realizing it), this person trusted me more than the others to do the task.

I think that nicely illustrates the power of listening.

Posted by Deborah Zanke on 11/11 at 10:50 AM

I couldn’t agreed more with your opinion. Especially for working women, with kids and household works, we barely find time to listen to other peoples.

Work At Home
Work At Home Business

Posted by Catherine Fan on 12/07 at 11:58 PM

Hi Katya,

I absolutely know what you mean and have the same challenge. It’s partly about making time to listen, and partly about making time to do the other things, so that we have time to listen.

In the fall Amy Sample Ward did a how-to post on creating a listening dashboard, which I have found really helpful in terms of my ability to listen without getting overwhelmed. I wrote about it on the GJD blog today: http://www.grandjunctiondesign.com/blog/listen_critical_not_overwhelmed
And here’s Amy’s original post with the instructions:
http://amysampleward.org/2009/10/27/how-to-create-a-listening-dashboard-for-your-organization/

Thank you, as always, for being worth listening to!